Un-Advice

Myth: Dating Is Easier For Women

online-dating2

One of our favorite female-empowered blogs recently covered one “brave” man who decided to pose as a woman on an online dating site. You may have seen it. This poor fellow did what others have done before: Attempted to manipulate the Internet to prove women have it so much easier when it comes to dating.

He didn’t even last two hours.

While his social experiment basically continued to prove many men will hide behind a screen to be extra creepy, skeeveball-tastic or just plain disgusting, there is a point here that STILL hasn’t been addressed: Dating is not easier for women.

First, there’s the creepster factor. Women online and in real life are frequently harassed and objectified. There’s no excuse for that and, unfortunately, there’s probably no end in site. So every day, women need to sift through the garbage to find a half-way decent gem that could be brushed off to find her cubic zirconia (diamond just seemed too unrealistic here).

But then there’s the other women who struggle to find dates. As previously discussed, I consider myself a Bermuda Triangle of sorts. There’s also something about my profiles that just doesn’t encourage many messages. Maybe it’s the content. Maybe it’s the photos. So far, no clear answer to this phenomenon has surfaced. And even offline, dating isn’t easier. In this situation, I know many women (including myself) who just can’t seem to “bump into” a possibly-special-someone at the grocery store, coffee shop, bar, office or wherever else men are hanging out (for real – where should I go?). [HowtowithCourtney Suggestion: Old people’s basements? Dungeons and Dragons meet ups? Hooters?]

Yet with all this the assumption is it’s still easier for women to date. NOPE.

I think it’s time for everyone to just admit that dating is hard. But dating is hard in different ways – for men and women and then for every individual. How to With Courtney and I have had a few “arguments” about how we both can’t get good suitors online – but at least she gets the creepy messages. Even the creeps don’t want to take a risk with me. It’s all about perspective. Just be nice to your fellow daters and try to understand that dating is awful. Period.

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5 thoughts on “Myth: Dating Is Easier For Women

  1. So true! :) Dating is just plain hard! But online made the most sense to me. I couldn’t meet someone through work (because I don’t want to date myself. I mean, I’m awesome but the constantly agreeing with myself on every subject gets boring), or through friends ( I don’t like my friends that much), or in a coffee shop (I’m a coffee snob and have yet to find a place that brews better coffee than my kitchen), or at the grocery store (I’m usually too stressed out picking the perfect tomato to make eye contact, yet alone smile). So that left me with online dating, which (thankfully) worked out pretty well. :) Anyway, that’s all to say, great post! It had me chuckling in line at the DMV.

    • I think I’m going to start dating myself more. Isn’t the old saying you’re more desirable when you’re already taken? I hear you on picking out the perfect tomato – I have the same panic trying to get a good avocado or bag of grapes that aren’t too squishy or too hard and might have the fewest sour ones… Clearly finding a date in the grocery store is not going to happen. Too much pressure there.

      Happy to hear that online dating has worked for you! Enjoy it! :)

      • So true! Plus, he’s probably just trying to defend himself so he can sleep at night- no point in arguing. Hopefully your next date goes better. ;)

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