Cancelling a date at the last minute – most of us have done it some point, or had it done to us.  I’ve certainly been on both sides, and given my recent run of bad luck on the whole eleventh-hour-bail-out thing, I’ve begun to wonder if there should be some kind of formal etiquette for backing out of dates at the last minute.

DO:

• Give at least 24 hours’ notice where possible – this will give him/her an opportunity to come up with alternative plans, take their gym bag to work etc.
• Try to make your excuse sound at least half-believable.  The chances are that the person you’re cancelling your date with will recognise it for what it is, but you can at least aim for a few credibility points.
• Reschedule (if you want to) within 48 hours of the cancelled date.  If no one bothers to make contact, you can be fairly certain that it’s never going to happen.

DON’T:

• Get angry and abusive and send messages along the lines of “WHY are you lying to meeee?!”  The moral high-ground is ALWAYS the better option.
• Ask for proof of the (fake) injury/illness/drama that led to the cancellation.  This just screams stalker.
• Follow up the next day with an “are you feeling better?” text.  They cancelled on you, they probably don’t want to see or hear from you.  Truth hurts…

Last Friday night, I was all excited about going on a date with Tall Guy.  This was going to be a TinDate and the first time we would have met.  We’d been messaging all day and he’d even asked me if I could meet him earlier than the original planned time as he was done for the day.  Clearly this guy was keen as mustard.  Then, ONE HOUR before we were meant to meet up, I received the following message:

I have several issues with this:

• This guy had cancelled on me ONE HOUR before we were meant to meet up and on a Friday night no less.  So having spent the day looking forward to cocktails with Tall Guy, I was now looking at a night home alone with a pizza…
• What girl dumps her boyfriend in the middle of a Friday afternoon when she’s meant to be at work?
• And then is so cut up about it (clearly shouldn’t have dumped him in the first place if she was going to be in this much of a state) that she calls A GUY rather than her girlfriends??
• I know I’m not the only girl that would have told a close friend to go on the date (albeit in a rather martyred way) rather than spending the evening handing out tissues and various forms of saying ‘you’re so much better off without him’.

Cancellations are, in my opinion, a fairly unavoidable aspect of dating, especially if you’ve never actually met the person you’re meant to be going on a date with.  Anyone can freak out at the last minute and have a change of heart, but at least try to give as much notice as possible.  After all, a girl needs a chance to call in some reserves!