Un-Advice

“Dewy Adorable Days”

do something amazingYou may have heard about Susan Patton, the “Princeton Mom,” and her book that urges women to find their mate while in college because after graduation, your chances of finding someone are dramatically reduced.

Last week, The Daily Show’s Senior Women’s Correspondent, Kristen Schall, gives a fantastic satirical explanation of why your “dewy adorable days” are over as you approach 30. Go ahead and watch the clip. We’ll wait here.

We appreciate Kristen’s rant on women losing their appeal after college. Each point she makes shows just how absolutely absurd that argument really is. Sure, it was possibly easier to find a man in college because you’re exposed to a variety of people in a closed circuit. It’s easier to “bump into” someone on campus or in the classroom. In the real world, you may be confined to a desk and have fewer opportunities to meet people outside your own office space or work environment (and dating at work isn’t always the best idea).

That doesn’t mean it’s impossible to find someone. And it doesn’t mean you won’t find someone who’s smart and awesome and has similar interests.

What’s most perplexing is why marriage seems to be the most pressing end goal for this. I went to college to learn things, not man hunt. From those things I learned, I was able to start a career doing something I really like and wanted to do. Isn’t that the real goal of attending college? If I were already married and expected to be keeping a household clean, making dinner and those sorts of traditional wife-like tasks, I would fail. First, because I do not like doing any of those things. Second, because I’d rather spend time at work where I have fun and I’m challenged in a good way. Vacuuming… not so much.

Why is the argument that marriage is the goal in life? It’s not hard to get married. It’s not a skill that times time, effort, practice or knowledge.

So get out there and DO something with yourself. Take what you learned in college and apply it to furthering your career. Open that little side business doing what you’ve always dreamed about doing. Set some goals and accomplish something. Take “getting married” off your To Do list and replace it with “Do something amazing.” You can worry about getting married later after you’ve done something awesome for yourself. Shouldn’t you be able to grow old and proudly say “These are my accomplishments in my lifetime,” rather than just “This is my husband, Frank. He’s an accountant.”

The point here? As Kristen Schaal paraphrased: “Men are terrible creatures – get one as soon as you can.” Or, you know, don’t. Your “dewy, adorable days” are not limited. Be adorable for as long as you want. There’s no expiration on quality. We hear wines and whiskeys get better with age.

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3 thoughts on ““Dewy Adorable Days”

  1. Since I’m in my twenties now I noticed that the only thing girls are looking for is to find a boyfriend and eventually get marry. There is no problem with that, but the thing is that in that process of being in a relationship and working towards their future together they forget the little detail that is living as an individual. Having fun, experiencing things, go out of your comfort zone. Though there is still plenty of time to get yourself a husband, there is not enough to live your life. There is no time better than your college ages to enjoy your life.

    • Right! If you find someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, that’s cool. But there’s no reason to rush into things and worry about finding someone fast.

      There really isn’t enough time to live your life so experience new things in your younger years when you likely have more time and fewer responsibilities.

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